As quickly and sparingly as this loved had formed death, had soon thought otherwise of its fate. Before it had a single chance to blossom amongst the other lovers in the garden its colours started to fade as it withered into something far from what it once was. Just as the sunlight had conceived its life did it then burn the petals down to the steam into ashes. For all we can now tell is that no seed will bare from where that love had grown so pure, so untouched, so destin to end. 

Six months you are to be gone,

Far from me far from home

I will wait for you

Till the day is due

When you come back here

Oh I’ll be missing you my dear

But I can wait for both our sakes

Now you and I have met I believe in fate

Though I do have doubts what If we don’t pull through

You said it will be worth it I hope that to be true

Every day I’ll be thinking of you, your name

I’ll hide the pain I’ll withstand from going insane

Cause I won’t be able to get you off my mind

My feeling just can’t decline

So to sooth my misery and keep me sane

I’ll play back all the times we shared again and again

I try to remember all the times we spent together

Laughing, crying those moments I’ll always treasure

If only you could have stayed

Oh think of the memories we could have made

But it was best to let you be on your way

I didn’t want to burden you or take your dreams away

Of living out in the country with clear blue skis every day

All though sometimes I wish I told you everything I wanted to say

That you are the only one who can make me smile

For longer than a couple seconds it lasts a while

That brings the rainbow after the rain

The one who makes the sun shine; drains away the pain 

A desperate kiss that met my lips has led me to my sins

Has got me playing back all that was said and everything we did

I’m not going to confess my wrongs I promised that to you

So I guess I’ll meet you in hell if the myths are to come true

You left me in the park bewildered and a stray

Drowning in these feeling I don’t wish to go away

The torture of the moment when I could have had you all

Inhaling your breath and imagining it all

I know I should regret every time we meet

Pretend it didn’t happen, just forget

But I don’t work that way I’ll just have to suffer

Being enveloped by your charm that’s just a hidden horror

Within reach but forbidden to touch

I’ve never thought it was possible to struggled this much

To tame myself of my feelings

And hold back my secret inner ambitions

I guess if it was worth it this wouldn’t be so hard

To wave you a goodbye, you’ve left me scared

I struggle to hold back my tears

We crossed the boundaries now I’m seeking refuge in fear

To run away from once innocent intentions

To be able to be friends was made under false pretences

Especially after what we had in those certain circumstances

If that path wasn’t walked I wouldn’t be so distraught

I won’t forget all you did all the wrong you taught.

Now as I walk a way I just have to say

Imagine if life had guided us in a different way?

Mistreated

Your getting to much, I can’t handle this,

I’m sick of your lies, your same old tricks

It was fun at first, it seemed so sweet,

No you’ve turned cold and bitter, you’re full of deceit

But I can’t run away, because I’m tied to you,

I can’t escape and I don’t know what to do

I can’t forget that you never could commit

This all you fault you’re the bloody culprit

I know you don’t love me so why do you bother

I’m not anything you want yet you keep getting closer

I take a breath yet you still it from me

I’m hungry for air its killing me

Do you want me to suffer is that your game

Do you think it’s funny when you see I’m in pain?

Do you cause these fights, these arguments on purpose?

Just for your fucking entertainment, to get some amusement?

I wish you’d just leave or cut this tension

I’ve always noticed it but it has never been mentioned

If only you had the guts to admit all the love you have for me

This wouldn’t be hard it could even be easy

But we’re talking about you like we always do

Nothing is up to me it’s always up to you

So make a decision or else I won’t just leavening

I’ll end this life all broken and bruised I’ll be bleeding

Getting close to the absence of a heart, a hollow soul,

Was my fate until your existence became known

 my lack of belief for the words you said were so.

have made me fearful for something we could behold.

As pure as gold and as valuable all the same,

have caused me to hear your name echo again and again.

These feeling haven’t just got my mind going insane

They have made me feel whole, how I hope it remains

Together we can battle the consciousness of one’s mind

The conflicts the, the misconceptions, the cruel and kind

To discover the possibilities no other method could find

To open our eyes to see beyond the sight of the blind

With you and I there will be no room for refrained limits

Like a clock without ticking without a care for its minutes

We shall share our knowledge, learn to trust confess our secrets

Like we’ve known each other for years, a couple of misfits

Reminisces till the days fade from day to day

Until there is no more things left to say

I’ll tell you I’m no longer afraid, that I’m going to stay

Then we can love each other will love each till our lives fade away. 

Her bruised hand tells a story of a masked life she lead into the darkness. It paints a picture of the colour’s that cover the canvas of her mask. Stretching out her fingers as if they were pulled by strings reveals the skeletal structure that forms her fragile swollen hands. 

Envy is a dangerous thing,

Makes you sour; coloured green,

Stains you like a poison sting,

Makes you question everything.

It turns your eyes blind,

Clouds the logic of the mind,

Makes honesty hard to find,

Turns you bitter; no longer kind.

You’re always wondering what they might of done,

Who’s the real father of your newborn son?

You begin a fight, but the war has begun,

Scarred to think that unseen other might have already won.

Did he cheat on me with the girl down the street?

Is all that occupies your mind, all that you think.

It’s driving you mad, that little deviant sneak

Envy is a better thing, starts weaving a maze of lies beneath your skin.

But don’t forget to think twice,

Before you take away all that’s nice,

Such thoughts are deadly; a crippling vice,

Crushing your trust; oh the cost of such a price.

Envy is a dangerous thing,

Makes you sour; coloured green,

Stains you like a poison sting,

Makes you question everything.

A penny or a smile

Will convince me of a life worthwhile

Or forever I will not know

If you love me because you don’t let it show

I find it hard to understand

We you can’t reach out your hand

I have offered my help I have told you I’ll stay

I have promised to listen to all you’ve got to say

But you never could accept the things I would give

And now your questioning whether I care or if I did

Oh but only you knew that I choose you

You’re the only one I’d ever promise to

But know you’ll run away afraid of yesterday

Send me a love letter hand written, from your heart

Tell me how you feel, if you’ve loved me from the start

Remind me of the memories together, the one we’ve made

Then tell me once more over that you wished you have stayed

They are wasting away with every step that they take

Refusing to eat they start becoming weak

With nothing to fuel there body they start to fade

Digging by the second, burring there own grave

Slimmer and skinnier they seem to appear

You can barely see them now they almost disappear

Under those baggy clothes that used to fit nice and snug

Is a skeletal figure that they pull and tug

There grabbing at their apparent fat

Though it doesn’t exist they don’t understand where they are at

I gave you a home so warm and safe, Of constant nourishment in which you could bathe. Your lungs so frail, your heart beat soft, You were right there and I couldn’t boast.I was to young to cradle your soul, So I had to abort you, no one was to know. So selfish such an act many do say,Though their not wrong, I should of let you stay. Days have past since you’ve been and gone, Now I just feel like I’m all alone. I’m sad to say we had to part, I grieve everyday, I just wish you had known I loved you in each and every way. So sincere are these words, that you must know, If I could of had it any other way I wouldn’t of let you go. I’m sorry I couldn’t give you more weeks or less pain from the start,But I will never forget the mark you made permanently on my heart. 

No I’m not dead yet, life hasn’t swallowed me whole. I have made my mistakes, I have felt regret, my heart has been cold. But I’m not going to let life swallow me whole, I’m not going to pay for what I didn’t know. I’m not going to forgive and forget, I’m going to learn and grow. Because I’m not ready for the afterlife when I haven’t finished with the one that has the essence of home. I’ll pay my dues for what happened when I knew what was to follow. By crying myself to sleep afraid of what I have brought to my tomorrow. Many will look at me with a roll of the eyes, for I seem like any other bird that doesn’t know how to fly. They want stop to notice the sorrow of my misguided pride. The one that has lead to a broken sort of smile.

Another sleepless night I’ve dedicated to you,

Uncertain on the feelings of yours to be true. 

Playing back the conversations in my head.

Trying to work out everything I had miss read.

Struggling to make any sort of logical sense,

Of the answers in the world of the past tense.

Because I instantly want to forget the memories,

When I discover the regret I created from conspiracies.

And it’s all my fault, yes, I know I’m the one to blame,

For letting such a friendship turn into fiery flames.

So easy it could have been to let my dreams be said,

To reveal all the possibilities we could have met. 

Just when you thought you got rid of me, another person you’ll never have to see.There was a knock on your door, accompanied by a familiar call.Once you quivered in your seat and thought about who it could be.You begin to stand to your feet, cautious but curious on the familiar stranger your yet to meet. Now chain detached from the wall, you grab the handle and proceed to open the door. Though just before you reveal the person who stands before you hidden by a seel. You decide that maybe you should of checked the identity of who you are soon to of met. To late it will be when the wind makes your decision with a gush of noise, you’ll be facing your mirrored image.

I find myself constantly rewinding my life’s tracks to try and understand, just make sense of the pathway that has been leading me into the dark. But the more I try, the more I’m blinded by the light. The very thing that warmed my heart had made me as unclear on my surroundings as the darkness has been doing. Though there is one major difference. Being in the darkness makes the innocent, positive and hope invisible. Whilst bringing guilt. negativity and despair to the forefront.